Flula Borg is willing to try anything in the name of entertainment, and he usually pulls it of with flying colors. (Source: Robbie Jeffers/Graphic: George Jones)
(RNN) - A German live musician who still wears a fanny pack and prefers to eat tacos with his head sideways is poised to take over the internet - as soon as he clears up some confusion.
Flula Borg - simply known as Flula - has made it well-known that American idioms cause him great confusion.
An encounter with a daddy longlegs spider in his bathroom inspired a two-minute musing on where that ridiculous (his words) name came from. Nearly 180 YouTube videos later, the Los Angeles-based entertainer with perfect comedic timing has shown more of his engaging and random personality.
But he also has a serious side, including pointed thoughts on controversial New York mayoral candidate Anthony Weiner.
"I think if he sends pictures of his junk, I can send pictures of my junk - my empty yogurt containers, my Xbox - things like this," Flula said. "If people like to see junk perhaps I might make photos of this. I think my junk is nice. Sometimes I put it in my trunk. I think my recycle man enjoys my junk."
There are some other things you should know about the man with a personality almost too big for the internet:
Please, just say what you mean
While American phrases confuse Flula, he said there are some in Germany that would make U.S.-born folks give the confused puppy dog face.
For instance: "Ich kann sitzen und baden in der es," or something like that (Flula, we tried).
"I can sit and bathe inside it, which is what you say when you enjoy nice food. So let us say you give me a hamburger or some soup, and it's very good. I say, 'ich kann sitzen und baden in der es.' The visual is me in the bathtub, and you are dumping hamburgers into the tub, and I just love it and hug it."
Santa must get a 'Clausfax'
Some of the words in the popular Christmas tune Santa Claus is Coming to Town perplexed Flula.
How can Santa know when you're sleeping or know when you're awake? The only way Flula would consider a visit from "Creeper Claus" (again, his words) would be if he saw some credentials.
"You know how they say, ‘Show me the Carfax?' Perhaps if they show me the ‘Clausfax,' and I see that he is not a creeper person and I have records of him that he's a clean man - he shaves, you know - and no history of child strangeness, then I'd say, ‘Perfect, bring me my gift.'"
Obviously, the jolly red elf he grew up with is different from the one most people stateside have come to know.
"If Santa likes you, hey candies for you. When Santa does not like you, you really get the sticks and charcoals in your shoes. He's not always happy with the cookies and overweight. No, ours is skinny, ready for marathons."
His knowledge of college football would get him stoned
"I love hoops. Is it popular in Alabama?" he asked innocently. "Oh wait, you have your Nick Sabans, and your many titles. Forrest Gump was on the Tide. Robert Horry and Big Brown Bryant, yeah?"
Umm, OK Flula, let's work on that before you visit Alabama, yeah?
His mind is a maze
A game of word association revealed some interesting things about the way Flula thinks. Although we can't include it all, here are some highlights with his responses on the right.
Goat - "Parmesan"
Fraulein - "Harrison Ford" (Fraulein is the German equivalent of "Ms.")
Edgar Allen Poe - "Beach ball"
iPhone - "Aardvark"
Death - "Neapolitan" (Flula revealed he ate so much Neapolitan ice cream he wanted to die, although he hates that flavor. Somehow, an irritated drive-thru server at Wendy's was thrown in.)
"Plaster station" - "Monkeys" (Trust us, it's worth clicking the link to watch the video.)
True Hollywood Story: Dinosaur DJ
So, what exactly would a biographical film about Flula look like?
"We start, and it's like I'm in a tiny egg, and then it's like watch out! Here comes the smoke, and then there's a voice that's like, ‘In a world where nobody is here comes a man who is… a man.' And then I punch out the egg, and then I jump out and say, ‘boom!' And then it's finished."
Who would play the leading role, you ask?
"I'd say Denzel Washington is my No. 1 choice. Then if he is busy, perhaps Morgan Freeman. I like him very much, he has a great voice. Maybe Linda Ronstadt."
Let us know how this works out for you, Flula. It could be genius or a hot mess.
Copyright 2013 Raycom News Network. All rights reserved.
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