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Professor Wrestling: Recapping ECW's 'One Night Stand'

Cena Drops Belt To RVD

POSTED: 10:07 pm CDT June 8, 2006
UPDATED: 11:36 pm CDT June 11, 2006

Listen up!

Class is in session.

Extreme Championship Wrestling took center stage this past weekend with a pay-per-view extravaganza in New York, N.Y. The ECW brand, which Vince McMahon owns, is coming back to TV soon (a weekly series on the Sci-Fi channel), and the PPV was the official kick-off for the relaunch.

That's your set-up. Here's what happened:

Challenge Match: Tazz vs. Jerry Lawler
What Should Happen: It's the former ECW star turned WWE announcer versus the longtime "Raw" color man. Who should win? Gotta give it to Tazz, the youngster. Besides, have you seen the Burger King win a big match other than against the late, great Andy Kaufman?

What Will Happen: Tazz will make sure BK taps out.

What Did Happen: Tazz made Lawler tap out in no time.

Challenge Match: Randy Orton vs. Kurt Angle
What Should Happen: Yeah, nothing says ECW more than these two WWE Superstars going head-to-head. Oh, sure, former U.S. Olympian Angle pledged allegiance to Heyman, but I have a feeling Sci-Fi told Vince to put some starpower into the show or it would last as long as one of those red-shirted "Star Trek" crew members backing up Capt. Kirk on a strange planet. For the record, the new ECW recruit should win, otherwise why have him in camp?

What Will Happen: Angle not only beats Orton, but he hurts him.

What Did Happen: Orton tapped out, and Angle won.

Challenge Match: Mick Foley, Edge and Lita vs. Tommy Dreamer, Terry Funk and Beulah
What Should Happen: As Kevin from Falcon Heights, Minn., mentioned just last night, "Can Funk even walk?" The answer is: Yes, to the ring -- but barely. This is a joke of a match, and Foley and Edge should win easily. But what fun would that be? This is an ECW show, and the absolute underdogs should get the win.

What Will Happen: Dreamer and Funk get the pins in a lengthy bloodbath.

What Did Happen: Edge speared and pinned Beulah in what became a six-person match. The underdogs lost, for no good reason. An OK match, but a dumb finish.

World Heavyweight Championship Match: Rey Mysterio (c) vs. Sabu
What Should Happen: This could be really good. Sabu has been around for a while, but can still go. There's no way Mysterio will -- or should -- lose here, but that doesn't mean the match can't steal the show.

What Will Happen: Expect a lot of high-flying and a zillion two-counts, but Rey will win.

What Did Happen: Both Sabu and Mysterio were counted out after they crashed through a table. Mysterio retains his belt. So, in effect, I got this one right.

WWE Championship Match: John Cena (c) vs. Rob Van Dam
What Should Happen: This is my upset call of the night. Here, John Cena should lose to Van Dam (who earned the title shot at "WrestleMania 22") so RVD can carry the WWE belt to the first showing of ECW on Sci-Fi. There, he renames it the ECW Championship belt. Now I know that Edge and Cena are billed to meet at the Vengeance PPV, but Cena can win it back at a "Raw" show before then. The point is, it would be a great lure to get casual fans to watch ECW on its new TV home.

What Will Happen: RVD wins as Cena is booed out of the building. RVD has been pushed for far too long for this not to happen.

What Did Happen: RVD took it after Cena was speared by Edge.

That'll do it. Four out of five correct for the big matches, including the main event upset. I may mangle a sentence here and there -- and you may see a typo every once in a while, but you can't argue with these two words: I'm awesome!

Now scram!

Class dismissed!

(Professor Wrestling is a masked employee of Internet Broadcasting. Got a question, comment, complaint? E-mail him right here. )


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